Now that was a brutal night. And the last time I let a doctor’s advice trump my experience and observations.
The backgrounder; after the twins one year warranty check-up the doctor told us that the kids should be sleeping through the night. We were told that they have enough body weight to carry them through the night without a middle of the night bottle. Suuuure.
Last night at about 10:30pm I gave Baby A her usual top up before sleeping bottle. All good. She goes to sleep, her Momma goes to sleep and her sister goes to sleep. I even go to sleep.
Until 12:30am when it sounds like a devil banshee is in the nursery devouring Baby A. Screaming at a volume you might scream at if you were approached in an underground parking lot by a thug wearing a hoodie pulled low over his face. That was not the wake-up call I was anticipating.
Clamber out of my sleepy reverie and stagger into the nursery. Try to soothe the savage beast that has taken the place of Baby A before its mother and Baby B awake. Limited success, she goes back to sleep after a half hour of rocking in the chair.
Back to sleep until 2:30am when the screams threaten to wake the neighbours three doors down. Out of bed, to the nursery before the mother awakens. There is no soothing this savage thing. In a very low, almost growling voice Baby A speaks her first words; “Get me a bottle NOW.” And then reverts to screaming.
Down to the kitchen with her, bottle in the microwave for forty seconds all the while the savage beast I have carried downstairs is howling like a child possessed. Her mother comes down the stairs to demand why I have not made the microwave warm the bottle faster so that the beast could be fed. Somehow it is all my fault when things go awry in the middle of the night.
Back up to the nursery with the savage beast who now has a bottle in her mouth and is calming…somewhat. Finish the bottle, baby falls asleep again…for thirty minutes. Enough of this already. I can no longer see out of my right eye due to the throbbing in my head. Place the child in the bed beside me and tell her to go to sleep. She does for the rest of the night. In twenty minute intervals.
Every twenty minutes she wakes up, tries to crawl over my face and into the void at the head of the bed, screams a bit as I put her back in position to sleep. Falls asleep until 6:20am at which there is no more sleep to be had.
Stagger downstairs to find their mother, my coffee princess, already in the kitchen grinding the beans. And another day begins.