H1N1 vaccine reconsidered because…

If you had twin baby girls at home who are too young to get vaccinated against the H1N1 flu and you worked in a place where some of the people believe it is important for them to come into work even though they have been positively diagnosed with H1N1, would you reconsider getting the vaccine yourself? I am reconsidering.

We have come too far to let our little ones come to such risk. Caragh was hospitalized at week 29 of the pregnancy because she went into pre-term labour. That means that she was in a hospital bed, not allowed out for anything other than toilet trips until the twins were born. You try laying in a hospital bed for four weeks. All we did was pray that we could get to 30 weeks so our little beans’ lungs would be better developed. Yeah, babies are born earlier than 29 weeks but it makes their lives so much more complicated. We wanted to get to week 30. And we did.

So then we pray for week 31, and then 32. And then I got the call from a doctor telling me to sit down, stay calm and listen. When someone says stay calm, the first thing you do is panic. “Something has happened to the babies…their heart rates have dropped by half and we are monitoring the situation. You best get here as fast as you safely can.”

Just a little less than 24 hours later, on day one of week 33, we had twin daughters. Born at 1705 grams and 1750 grams. 1705 or 1750 grams is tiny. And then they lose weight. They dropped to 1500 grams and you wonder when they will begin to gain weight. And you wonder when they will be able to eat and breathe on their own. And you sit there ina chair with this baby, the tiniest baby you have ever seen, you sit there and hold this tiny baby and wonder what kind of a miracle made this possible. Then you think back and realize it was actually a bottle of red wine, a little Barry White and that back rub that made it all possible…

And then you wonder when the feeding tube will come out. And then you wonder why she has blood in her lungs. And then you wonder if she can eat more than 3 grams of food at a time. And you wonder if the breast milk will come seeing as you cannot be with your babies all day and all night…it does, and it did. And then the doctors shave one of your little babies pretty little head because her hand is so small they cannot get another needle into it. And you wonder when that will grow back…and why did they need another IV in her?

The days go on, the weeks roll by, and going to the hospital becomes part of your daily life routine. Sitting and holding a tiny little baby who doesn’t seem to ever get bigger. Babies that look more like skinned rabbits than babies, but babies you think are the most beautiful ever born.

And then after seven weeks of going to the hospital the doctors say, “you can take one of your babies home but not the other.” And you wonder if they will be okay being away from each other. And Baby B has to stay in and you wonder why she is not able to eat and breathe like her sister suddenly can.

And then a couple of weeks later you go to visit and the hospital people say you can take Baby B home.

And then you have two miracle babies at home. A week before they were even due to be born they are at home and they are beautiful and they are all ours and we love them more than anything else in this world and it is all right. It is so perfect. And you realize that you would do ANYTHING to protect your precious babies and you do. Because these are the most incredible babies in the world. And even though you realize probably every parent goes through this same routine (with some mods) you know that your babies are the best, brightest, and most incredible.

I will do whatever I can to protect these precious little ones. And if that means I need to risk myself by getting a vaccination to protect me from contracting H1N1, I will do so.